Hey, Four Eyes

I got new glasses.  After wearing them for more than twenty years now, I have to say I am more excited for these than just about any I've had.

When I first got glasses at age six, my dear mother braced me for potential teasing.  We practiced witty comebacks in the car back from the doctors office, so I could properly take the wind out of my would-be harassers' sails, as she said.  If someone called me four-eyes, I was supposed to say that four are better than two.  First-grade Meaglette liked that one best. I was all like, "oooooh snap. Four ARE better! Suck it, lame-o two-eyes!"

 I can't imagine who would make fun of such sweet oversized pink plastic frames like this anyway.  If you put glasses on a Cabbage Patch Kid, this is what it looks like:

 Blame my parents for allowing this to happen - it was the 80s, and I was a minor.  They also thought those bangs were a good idea (and cut them so straight by putting Scotch tape across my forehead, but that's a different story).

Thankfully, I am now left to my own devices to choose my frames (and grow out my bangs).

These are the first new pair I've gotten in sevenish years, and well worth the wait, in my opinion. Kate Spade really knows her shit.

 When I went in to order them a few weeks ago, I bee-lined directly to the "super ridonk overpriced sticker shock shock" section of the store.  I was never allowed to look at those when I was on my parents' tab (rightfully so - their money, their call), but now that I get big girl paychecks, I was pretty pumped to drop one on my eyeballs.

They were, in fact, ridonk expensive, but amazingly enough not because of the frames.  My coke-bottle lenses and the medical magic it takes to compress them into non-hideous (ie: oversized pink plastic) frames costs a buttload and a half. Oh, plus I sprung for anti-glare coating, cuz that's how I roll.  Besides, I luff them.  It's refreshing to feel cute in my glasses, not frumpy and gross. Which means I'll wear them.  Which means they're worth it.  That's basic fashion math.

At least until I can afford Lasik.